| Frame | carved from a solid block of shit. |
| Front Fork | deluxe stainless-steel sturkey slicing fork from IKEA |
| Bottom Bracket | bottem brakets are for pussies |
| Cranks | theres no need to pedal with this beaut! |
| Chainrings | Hella. |
| Pedals | soggy slices of moldy toast! |
| Front Derailleur | this beaut doesnt need that stuff |
| Chain | wtf? |
| Rear Derailleur | omg! |
| Cogset | umm.. ya right! |
| Hubs | no thanks |
| Skewers | i love skewers! |
| Spokes | plastic fatties |
| Rims | 20" hella deece car wheels |
| Tubes | river tubes! |
| Tires | monster truck tires, obviously |
| Brakes | a stick, which you put in the spokes |
| Seatpost | seats are for wimps |
| Saddle | as i said, seats are for wimps |
| Headset | bj! |
| Stem | plastic |
| Handlebars | big ones |
| Shifters | LOL! |
| Brake Levers | MARZOCCHI!! or what ev. |
| Bar Tape | stfu |
| Extras | semen on toast being towed behind by a string |
